4 September, The Netherlands – ‘All Over The Place – Europe’

Our new executive producer Yvonne arrived here in Amsterdam yesterday to see how we go about putting this show together. Cosmic forces were obviously conspiring to make our boss think that we have it a bit too cushy, as everything went seamlessly.

For the morning shoot we were filming a song about windmills in the style of ‘Pump Up The Jam’ – entitled ‘Pump Out The Dam’. After lots of terrible breakdancing in front and on top of windmills (of which there are only a handful left to show to tourists, the rest having been pulled down long ago) we bundled ourselves onto our coach and headed into central Amsterdam for an afternoon on the cat boat. It’s basically Battersea Dogs’ Home for cats, but on a boat. There’s about 30 of them looking for homes and they all seem quite content in the meantime, staring out of the mesh running down the side of the boat and dreaming of murdering passing birds. Iain and I dressed up in cat jumpers and showed a genuine person coming to find a cat to re-home around the place, whilst pretending that he was a contestant on a dating show. He must have gone home extremely confused by the whole experience.

After filming I was quite pleased with myself when I was able to demonstrate a bit of local knowledge and take everyone to a good Ethiopian restaurant I know in Amsterdam. After 3 months in Europe we’re all getting a bit bored of European cuisine (as nice as it is), so we all ate twice as much exotic food as we should have done and rolled ourselves onto the tram back to our hotel.

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